A Poem by Linda Bearss

Quitting is Not an Option

 

He shakes his head in disbelief

he scuffles toward the cement block wall

pulls on his team sweats, sliding

down the shoulders of the tight singlet

tugging on his hat, eyes hidden, face

shadowed—anonymity in another loss.

 

He sits crouched, knees up

on the bleacher’s narrow step

face buried in his hands

every time, every match

he darts out faster

strains harder

strives longer

yet the moment arrives—

the referee slaps the rubber mat

and steps back to raise the other

boy’s arm, again and again.

 

He has grown four inches since summer

the baby fat is melting over  his

growing muscles—girls notice

 

He still has that boyish face

and innocent hazel eyes at 16.

 

Patience is a hard win

growing and leaving

is exhausting work.

 

A foot taller than her

he’s the youngest of

many brothers . . . warriors.

 

She settles in again

perched high in the bleachers

joining the loud crowd

shouting and breathless.

 

This is not the moment for hugs and comfort

mothers learn as sons grow and leave.

 

His anger is necessary

it mocks and drives him

to learn to press longer

to stare down what he cannot yet see.

 

She waits and prays:

“God, give him what he needs.”

 

They learn in silence and sweat

he faces his own demons and

designs his next match alone

quitting cannot be an option.

 

She watches silently as he

pulls up the yellow straps

shakes his muscles loose

and bounces on the polished

gymnasium floor, ready

for another turn to win

weighing moves and choices

beneath the crowd’s cheers and taunts

he waits to prove himself.

 

 

 

Linda Bearss has published poetry as well as articles on Theodore Roethke and Paul Laurence Dunbar. Her poetry and literary analysis have appeared in several anthologies, including: The Midwest Miscellany XXXV, Midwest Miscellany XXXIV, Midwest Miscellany XXVI, Temenos: Special Roethke Edition, Of Sun and Sand, Poised in Flight, and Tic Toc (anthologies published by Kind of a Hurricane Press). She is in the process of compiling two chapbooks, Steppin’on the Cracks and Taming a Tightrope. Linda Bearss is a long term fellow of the National Writing Project and member of the Academy of American Poets.